I hate being me...

i dont like the way i react to things....i make myself so mad...AHH im angry right now but its like.SAghsjkfghdkjghh fuck it..i dont wanna talk about it...later

I LOVE PATRICK!

"You"  >>>January 11,2005

I felt like I didn't belong.
I felt like no one cared.
I felt like my life wasn't worth living.
I felt like I was a nobody.
but that was only til' you came into my life.
You dont know how important you are to me.
I care for you so much.
I don't know what i'd do if you were never near.
I don't know what I did to deserve you.
But it must have been really good.
You mean everything to me.
You ARE my everything.
I love you so much.
I'll never leave your side.
I;ll never stop caring.
I'll never stop being there for you.
I'll never stop loving you.
I love you so much, you just dont understand.
I can't explain it.
I'll do anything for you.
I LOVE YOU!

"I remember"

I try to make you happy
but, nothings ever good enough.
I remember when we first got together.
I was all you talked about.
I was your life.
Now I come in second place.
I remember those calls.
The ones just to say "I love you."
I remember when I used to make you happy.
Now all i do is make you sad and angry.
I remember I used to write you notes
and you actually wrote back.
I remember you used to say you loved me...
and meant it.
I could feel it was real,
I dont know what happend.
Maybe we too things too fast.
Who knows?
I remember we used to make each other laugh.
now we just make each other cry.
I remember you couldn't stop looking at me.
Now, you cant stop looking at other girls.
I remember I was the only one you liked and loved.
Now theres 2 people that you possibly want to take my place.
I remember we used to be happy.
I dont know what happend, but i miss it so much.
I remember the little things.
Things I wished and Hoped would never go away.
Sadly enought, They did.

"I miss..."

I miss what we used to have.
You know. That kind of love we used to share.
I'm not saying, we dont have any love now.
It's just, it used to be strong.
I miss that way you used to say my name.
I miss that special kiss.
But most of all, I miss that trust we used to have.
and that happiness we used to love.
What Happend?
This I can not answer.
Now, all we do is argue.
All we do is fuss and complain.
All that trust is now gone.
The love is now not strong.
Everything we had is now lost.
Lost, and waiting to be found.
By both of us, not just one.
When will it happen?
To have this special time with you...
once again.